EMPLOYEE NOTICE FROM THE GOVERNMENT OF IRELAND
Due to the current financial situation caused by the Corona Virus and slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.
This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).
Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).
Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).
A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate.
Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).
Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government.
Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has always prided themselves on the amount of SHIT they give our citizens.
Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your TD, who has been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.
Sincerely,
The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)
PS - Due to Corona Virus, recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, The Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.
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Thread: Morning funny
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04-08-2020 07:12 AM #10691
Re: Morning funny
John Novotny
1979 53 MY "Serenity" #567
Baltimore, MD
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04-08-2020 10:30 AM #10692Senior Member
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- Apr 2008
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04-08-2020 10:58 AM #10693Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2007
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04-08-2020 11:54 AM #10694
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Re: Morning funny
Show the ladies.
SEVEN
1979 53' MY Hull #563
Antioch, California
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Re: Morning funny
You had one job.
SEVEN
1979 53' MY Hull #563
Antioch, California
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Re: Morning funny
Books for dummies
SEVEN
1979 53' MY Hull #563
Antioch, California
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Re: Morning funny
Needs to buy a Flobee
SEVEN
1979 53' MY Hull #563
Antioch, California
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Re: Morning funny
Ha ha ha
SEVEN
1979 53' MY Hull #563
Antioch, California
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Re: Morning funny
Jerk off
SEVEN
1979 53' MY Hull #563
Antioch, California